Find Romance In Love

Love is in the air. Valentine’s Day has arrived once again. So, who is your Valentine?



With this holiday surrounding us, we are confronted with the subject of romance. Yes, we all remember that euphoric sensation of being “in love.” In today’s society, we all know what this means. It fills our media with endless movies, songs, and novels about romantic partners. It is a cornucopia of good feelings brought about by the exclusivity of two people—no less than two and no more than two. Each one of us longs for that special someone—that is, if we have not found them yet. We have this idea of a special one out there for us. We all search for “the one.” Many believe each individual has a soul-mate out there somewhere. This soul-mate is the one that will be their exclusive romantic companion—the one that they can spend their entire lives being “in love” with.


Though the Christians of today may not believe in “soul-mates,” a great majority believe God has “the one” for them. This is basically the soul-mate idea dressed in a Christianized costume. So, is it true? Do we each have a special someone for us out there? I don’t know; I’ll let you decide.


Here is what I do know: romance in the real world doesn’t last forever. The fairy tales have deceived us. The media has displayed a plethora of beautiful mythology. As we always see, after the couple rides off in the sunset the story ends. Why? Is it because these cute narratives don’t want to show the couple’s sexual adventures that evening? Partially. However, what the story really doesn’t want to tell you is what happens a few years after that couple ride into the sunset. The lovey-dovey emotions go away. The flowing of the blood goes back to normal. The magic of something new fades. The couple becomes bored with one another and they find themselves in a rut. Have they “fallen out of love?” Perhaps. However, if your definition of being “in love” is that mystical, blissful sensation of passion, I submit to you that this is bound to end no matter what. This feeling is a temporary high; it is a sort of drug in many ways. This is why some scientists classify love as an addiction. It is an addiction one person has for another. However, the addiction is conditional. It is dependent upon each individual in the relationship feeling euphoric about the other. So, this idea of love we strive for is a myth among many of our human mind. At least, it is a myth when we talk about it between two humans. We will never find another human being that we will always feel “in love” with. Why? Because people aren’t perfect. People aren’t consistent. People change.


I find it fascinating that this modern idea of romance did not exist in ancient times. Back in the eras of our ancestors, there was no such thing as being “in love” (at least not in a popular sense like it is today). So why did they get married? To survive and to perpetuate the human race. To multiply the self. Also, to satisfy their sexual needs. Ancient marriages were arranged between two fathers for economic benefit. Each family would profit financially from this exchange. The husband and wife did not love one another when they got married. Marriage was their duty. If they felt that “in love” feeling later on in their marriage, it was a pleasant bonus. Marriage of ancient times was about duty and survival, not about love.


Some of you are thinking “That’s horrible!” Is it? Is it better that people get married because of special love feelings? If you answered yes, why? These feelings won’t last. Eventually, both individuals in the marriage couple will be unsatisfied somehow. How will they deal with this dissatisfaction? They will either seek being “in love” elsewhere (cheat on the spouse) or simply live in discontentment. What is the problem here? The problem is that humanity today seeks being “in love” with other humans. It is because of this that our society has so many issues.


So, what is it that humans are searching for? They are searching for an exclusive Lover who will satisfy their needs and fulfill their wants without fail. Where can they find this?


When the one some call “God” expressed humanity, He did so giving them this purpose: to be His image. An image refers to an idol, a representative symbol of a higher power. In ancient times, idols were crafted to contain the intimate presence of a deity—though ancient peoples didn’t believe in gods, they believed in cosmic authorities or powers of nature. Nevertheless, the ancient Israelites believed that their natural Authority created them to be His idol—His presence-carrier. This was their take on the human purpose.


So, how was this image of God created? From the dust of the ground and the breath of God. What would God call this creature, the last of His many creations? Well, He formed this image out of the ground (the Hebrew word “adamah”). Thus, He named His image “adam.” The Hebrew term “adam” is the single term used to designate all humankind. So, adam was one individual. However, God determined that adam needed a suitable companion to co-rule with (being the image of God meant being ruler over this planet). So, God split adam in two; He reached into adam and pulled out an “ishshah”—the Hebrew word for woman. The remaining adam then calls himself an “iysh”—the Hebrew for man. However, though God split adam in two parts, they would have to become one again in order to multiply the race. Nevertheless, since that time one adam is an iysh (man) and an ishshah (woman). Without both of these pieces, there is no complete human race. Both of these pieces comprise the race of adam—male and female. Thus, adam’s (humanity’s) purpose is to have God come inside of them. This is the romance which everyone needs and this is the romance everyone wants. No adam can be in Love unless Love is in them (God Is Love). How can adam (men and women) be in Love forever without Love in them?


You may wonder where we get the word “sex”—referring to gender—from. This term comes from the Latin “sexus” meaning “half.” To be a sex is to be a half. Clearly there are two halves to the whole. There are females and there are males. So, what about this issue of sexuality?


If sexuality is based on sex (the half), then it is dependent upon body parts. Those with male organs are the male half, those with female organs are the female half. What about hermaphrodites? This is something that is unfortunate, but clearly not the norm—thus I won’t address this issue at this time. The majority of human beings have clear male or female organs. So, your organs determine your sex (which half you are). When the male organ enters the female organ and performs its function, this is how another human is brought into the world. It doesn’t always produce a human being, but this is the only way to produce a human being. What about artificial insemination? Still, the male organ must operate and his product must enter the female organ. The process has never changed and it never will—though scientists and doctors will attempt to change this. Thus, each half of the human race has a duty to fulfill if we want our race to continue to survive. This is the obvious and natural truth regardless of how anyone feels.


What about our feelings? According to the reality I mentioned above, they are irrelevant. It doesn’t matter how I feel, if I want to perpetuate my fellow humans I must deliver my product to the organ of the other half. When it comes to survival it doesn’t matter how we feel; it only matters that we survive. So, what is the problem?


The problem is that we have a sexual drive. God made sure that we would be excited about multiplying our race. He put life’s most euphoric sensations into the process of child-making. The problem with the euphoric sensations is that they must be controlled. We must make them serve us, not let ourselves serve them. If we dedicate ourselves to feel those good sexual sensations, then the possibilities of what we can do are endless. However, they are not fruitful. There is only one way to produce a child no matter what we do. Men can satisfy their sexual drive with women. Women can satisfy their sexual drive with men. Men can satisfy their sexual drive with men. Women can satisfy their sexual drive with women. A group of humans can satisfy their sexual drive with another group of humans. Humans can satisfy their sexual drive with animals. Humans can satisfy their sexual drive with plants. Humans can satisfy their sexual drive with objects. Humans can satisfy their sexual drive with their own individual body parts. Humans can satisfy their sexual drive by forcing other humans to satisfy their needs (rape). The list goes on and on and on…


I reiterate: there is only one way to produce children and perpetuate the human race. The pleasure we each receive through multiplying ourselves is just a bonus. We should not make our lives revolve around this. Doing so is to have an addiction to experiencing sensual pleasure.


I submit to you that there is no such thing as “heterosexuality” or “homosexuality.” Our sexuality is in our body parts, and our sexual actions are just our means of fulfilling our sexual drive. There is only one productive, useful, functional, and fruitful way to fulfill the sexual drive: to produce children with someone of the other half. So why is “sexual orientation” such an issue? Romance.


Romance is worship. The word “worship,” refers to placing a great value or worth on something. We worship what we want to be with and we worship what we want to be like. Our worship determines the destiny of our individual identity. Addiction (dependence) is the highest form of worship. On this note, I remind you that many scientists classify being “in love” as an addiction. To be “in love” is to worship the human who you share romance with.


So, if you seek romance with another human (regardless of their gender), you are seeking to direct your worship toward humanity. Now, if you want nothing to do with God (the Lover) then you should just continue to worship humanity. I say this because humanity is the closest thing on earth to God (even with human failures). However, if you want a romance that will truly satisfy your needs and desires, you should stop seeking human-to-human romance and seek divine romance with the One Who designs you in detail on a moment-to-moment basis. He didn’t just create us long ago and turn His back on you. He isn’t just watching everything we do from afar. He is active and intimately involved in our lives. He determines our every destination as we relate to Him through the interactions we have with the world around us. All you love about the humans you know is only a small part of Who “God” is. What every human desires is a relationship with Love that never fails (Proverbs 19:22). This relationship is only found in the One so plainly called “God.”* (See * comment at bottom of page).


What about marriage? What about male-to-female relationships? Am I telling you to be single? No. God intended for male-to-female companionship and all human-to-human companionships; but each of these companionships has its own order. What He did not intend for is the human-to-human romance this society builds its life upon. When we have a romance with Love, then we will be “in Love” in everything we do. When we interact with all other men and women we will be “in Love.” Our relationship is supposed to be with the POP (Power Of Powers) known through SKY (Surrounding Kindness of Yahweh). The entire universe that surrounds us is one magnificent symphony that plays for our pleasure. It is His symphony. And as the symphony plays through everything we encounter, if we listen to it closely we can hear His constant lyric whispering in our ears: “I love you.” The question is: do you hear Him?


When we hear and reflect His words back to Him, then we enter into a perfect romance that will never end. This is how to live life abundantly. This is how to thrive. This is true survival (literally super-vival meaning “to live above and beyond”). Everything else is only temporary. Everything else ends with dust and desolation.


Love is in the air. Make Love your Valentine, now and always.


I leave you with the words of Jewish singer Matisyahu from his song “King Without A Crown”:


“Make room for His love and the fire can blaze, make room for His love and the fire can blaze: what’s this feeling? My love will rip a hole in the ceiling; I give myself to You from the essence of my being and I sing to my God songs of love and healing. I want Moshiach [Messiah] now! Time, it starts revealing…”


If you seek Him, you will find Him. But you must seek Him with all your being. Hold nothing back.


Deuteronomy 4:29 – “But from there you will seek Yahweh your Author and you will find Him, if you search after Him with all your thoughts and with all your being.”



*Note: When I say “God” I am NOT referring to a man in the sky. To understand “God” as He is written about in various Hebrew writings you must understand what science calls “Kinetic Energy.” It is only in a poetical sense and through human description that “God” is said to have a “face” or any other body parts. The pure and limitless (yet Self-limiting) Energy that holds all things and actively enables the universe by its expressions is the One so plainly called “God.” And “God” Is Love.